A list for Saturday

So last night I started cleaning the oven lol, today going to finish it (I dont use the nasty caustic chemically stuff, so lots of elbow grease hehe)

• Finish cleaning oven & racks
• Tidy Laurens room
• Do umpteen loads of washing and hang out 2 down, one in machine and one yet ot be washed
• Clean bathrooms/toilets2.21pm
• Get Damien to vacumn
• Grocery shopping .. KID FREE!!

That'll do it

*gasp* A POST

Well yes posts have been few & far between, I'm a slackass what can I say.
So all my baby type posts are here on my vox blog.

SO I need to do updates about me & Lauren.

Lauren, gosh where do I start, some days she is a normal 2.5year old and then she opens her mouth, I feel like I am having conversations with some one much older. Her vocab is amazing, and scary. She understands and can vocalise so much.
She is a firecracker, a frustrating, independent (some days, others days its 'help me')beautiful, amazing, cheeky little girl.. I love her so much, and on some days are endlessly frustrated.

She is *finally* going to sleep without booby, mainly because it was hurting too much with pregnancy. I never thought I would see the day tbh, but now we read stories, then lights go out I sing, rub her back, tell her Princess Lauren stories and she rolls over and goes to sleep its bliss, and if she wakes during the night (not often) she cuddles back to sleep as well, at first it was "booobiieeeee" but now has accepted she doesn't have any till she wakes up. When she does wake up (usually btwn 5-6) she has some then, but its not for very long.

I was feeling so terrible that the end of our breastfeeding relationship was so negative, I was HATING breastfeeding, it hurt, I had a real aversion to it. Not that I love it anymore, but I can tolerate it for a short while, I want the last feeds to be comfy not with me going "GET OFF GET OFF"

Where am I at. Pregnant! hehe Doing ok, I *was* on top of hte housework, but it takes one night of slack sleep and it has taken over again. Hopefully I can get back on top of it again. Feeling pretty good, although I have run out of MultiV's, I walked for a couple of mornings, but the last two havent happened *slack* I feel so great when I go for a morning walk.

I am scrapping again! Loving it :D
My latest:
CLICK

CLICK

List of things I should get done today:

• Put away clean washing
• Put away maternity clothes(in closet)
• Put away clothes I no longer fit & summer clothes
• Put shredded paper in recycle bin cause I know I wont remember to take to pet store
• Pick up crap from floor of computer room
• Put dishwasher on
• Tidy/clean kitchen
• Clean bathrooms
• Change linen on beds

There that should do it

Should do a proper post

But alll I have to offer atm is another LO :)
I tried to add words to this one but nup simple again :)

Credit: Tracy ann 'Flop' papers

Another one :o

Very very simple, but I just couldnt do anything else with it.
Credit:
Flower rub on - "Winter Chick" @ the ShabbyShoppe
Sanded overlay by Christine Smith

Gah! It needs a border, will do that tomorrow, too tired tonight.

A Layout! :O

OMG!

Credit:
'Winter Chic' @ the ShabbyShoppe

Its about time

What with christmas, and pregnancy I just seem to not update.
I have no morning sickness, but i have alll day indigestion (no heartburn) which is mega frustrating, and the tiredness .. ohh the tiredness.

We just spent thur-sun up at the ILs, was nice, I got to relax a lot and just read (Mills & Boon lol) while the ILs or Damien entertained Lauren

Damien is back to work tomorrow, I am not looking forward to it :( I have really found it helpful having him at home to tend to Lauren (when she will let him)

I cannot wait for the 2nd trimester, surely this tiredness and crappy belly will have to ease off a bit?? Have Damien & ILs asking me when I'm going to the doctor .. what for? I say I'm not sick. I may make an appt soonish and get some blood tests just to check levels and stuff .. maybe .. and get a 12 weeks scan if I have any pointers to this being a double pregnancy. Lauren is still adamant that there are two babies in my belly.

Need to ring a midwife too *blush* Should really get moving on that.

Life is just plodding along. Nothing of excitement happening .. mores the pity!
Some recent photos of Lauren

December
January

Oh and a screenshot from Betty .. my 20inch iMac

Rest In Peace Dad

I have had a rollercoaster 29 hours.

I got a phone call to say my father had passed away yesterday afternoon, after many tears and not being able to reach Damien I then got another phone call to say that he wasn't actually dead but in a drug-induced coma.

So many conflicting emotions, anger, sadness, confusion.

My uncle rang and confirmed the drug-induced coma, induced because of the intense pain Dad was in, it was only a matter of time, he suggested I ring the hospice and they could possibly put the phone up to his ear so I could tell him of my pregnancy, the fact that I hadn't yet told him had devastated me.

I rang the hospice and my cousin held the phone up to his ear, it was so very hard, but I told him of my pregnancy, that I loved him, and said goodbye.

I got a lot of closure from that phone call. I am so grateful that I had the opportunity to talk to him, even though he couldn't answer, I heard his breathing change and I *know* he heard me.

I got a phone call from my uncle and Dad passed away tonight. He was in a bit of pain near the end so I *know* that he is so much better off now, and is at peace.

I feel such peace, and relief.

Love and light Dad, may you now rest in peace.

Sooooo

Santa Photo

At least she wasnt as freaked out as she was last year :)

Yet another very late update

Trip to NZ was ok, didn't get to spend as much time with Dad as i wanted, Lauren didnt cope well with it all, the people coming & going, change etc she was a brat, I was exhausted but I did get to spend time with Dad :)

He improved so much over the time that we were there, and from speaking to him since he sounds a lot stronger which is great because it means he can enjoy the time he has left, he is a fighter so maybe he will stick around for a while to torment us ;)

We are trying to conceive #2 atm, the first three nights in NZ lauren had HEAPS of boob and I know that distrupted my cycle, so I was feeling positive until my cycle ended up with a luteal phase of only 7 days *sigh*, I am cutting Lauren back on the boob and hoping this cycle is more fruitful.

I am getting one of these *pets* 20inch iMac *drools*

Going to get it on the myer card in teh new year, maybe get it cheaper in any post xmas sales.
Cannot believe how little time there is left to xmas *panics*

Bought a few things at the oxfam store yesterday, i LOVE that store, could spend a fortune.
Got this necklace, I love her, so does Lauren :) Also got a wallet and a couple of xmas gifts.



Ok some Lauren cuteness to finish off

An Update

Sorry it has been so long, living in a fog atm, and trying to recover from camping.
Not up to a big post about the camping trip, but it wasnt what I had hoped :(

So my Dad only has months, maybe up to a year to live. :( :( :(
Lauren, Mum & I fly over tomorrow morning going to make the most of the time we spend with him.

Its just so unfair. I had a big bawl up at camping when I heard the news, I think I was in a bit of shock too, like I hadn't let myself believe it was all true until I heard those words. I am so thankful I was surrounded by friends.

I am sick with a cold atm which triples the ickyness of everything.
Will update more when I get back.
xxxx

Update

Mum, Lauren & I are booked to fly over to see dad on Nov17th -25th.
A group of my friends, wonderful wonderful ladies that they are got together and raised over $600 ot help me fly over to see my dad :( *cries* I am just so in awe of them, so very lucky to have them in my life.

I rang Dad today, he sounded awful, really drugged up on the morphine. *sigh*

I am not letting myself worry or get anxious though as it was really makin gme feel sick, and not helping either of us. Will find out more after the 7th (when he has appt with encology team)

Next week (monday - saturday)I am going camping with another great group of women & kids, really looking forward to it :D

Prayers/Positive thoughts needed for my Dad

My Dad only has one kidney, lost one to cancer when he was 18. He has been having problems for the last year and just yesterday has been diagnosed with secondary cancer of the remaining kidney.

They don't know where the primary cancer is. I only found out this afternoon when my brother rang me. It isnt sounding very good, but I am trying ot think positive, as is Dad. They are unsure of what course of action they are going to take from now, so its bascially a waiting game.

So if you could please spare a thought or a prayer for my dad it would be really appreciated

ETA: Its actually his liver that the secondary cancer is in, have recently found out that tha tis bad, I didnt want to accept how bad it is, yk, I . .just dont know what to think.

*hugs*

Give the people you love a big hug today, or let them know you love them.
Just because.

Life is precious.

*big hugs to you all*

Too much TV

Of late Lauren has been watchign TOO much tv, made me feel sick. So it has stopped.
She is allowed to watch two movies, or two blocks of TV, one in the morning one in the afternoon.

I feel so much better for it, I'm getting more housework done and she is playing with her toys/books etc so much more. I just hope I can keep it up.

She is asking for tV but I am managing to distract her
For example just now she said "Watch blues clues?" I said no not until this afternoon, so straight away she asked for Booby so im guesing booby is something that she 'does' iykwim, but now she is distracted with a torch and has forgotten about both booby & blues clues.

I have cleaned up kitchen & dining room today and feel so good for it, have also just put al lthe beans back into her beanbag, had to wash the cover as it was stinky, putting beans back into a beanbag is a hell 0f a lot easier than taking them out *lol*

Ok a photo and maybe some LOs to follow, not right now as Lauren is hanging off the desk.

Friday is what friday does

So its friday again, Damien has a flex day on monday .. woot! So hopefully we can have a nice family day :) (although just realised school holidays has started by then too .. ick!)

So it looks like we will be moving early January. So I have a few months to get all packed up thank goodness, also means we will be here for xmas, surrounded by boxes, but here ;)

Lauren looked like she was going to get a doozy of a cold, she had a fever for a couple of days and a snotty sounding nose, she still has a snotty sounding nose, but heres hoping it doesn't develop, lots of booby milk, fluids and rest.

I am on a mission to get photos printed, I haven't had photos printed since our trip to NZ last christmas, and for like months before that. So I have been through January of this year and edited and got it printed. Now on to february, I am hoping to get this year done, and then go back and do last year, and the year before that .. *groans* It will be nice to have the photos where we can actually enjoy looking through them though, at the moment they are all on the PC and well barely get looked at!

I also need to get frames for the photos we had taken, I went to Target cause they have 20% off frames, but just seems like a lot of money still :( Wish I could find some decent frames for like super cheap. Maybe just get some el cheapo ones and when we get super rich, buy some nice ones.

Lauren's latest 'thing' has been "I like.." or "Lauren likes..", we made gingerbread men at the beginning of the week, she was eating one yesterday, ate his head/legs/arms/icing and then asked for another, I said to her "You only want the icing don't you?" she grinned and said "I like icing" lol! So yesterday heard lots of "I like boobies" "I love mummy I love Nana I love poohbear I love.." etc etc

She is just so aware of everything, its frightening how clever she is.

Just a couple of photos

Cause I can ;)

Not sure if I like it ..

Only time will tell :S

So..

Those who have Beta accounts cannot comment on posts of those who don't SUCKS ROYALLY
So Kristie, I sent big *big hugs* and lots of strength.

In other breaking news, looks like we won't be moving up the coast till early next year, and the plans have apparently changed (the house plans) ILs are coming down today to 'discuss' it. Love how they just ring the night before and say "we are coming down tomorrow, is that ok?" I mean it is ok, but what if it wasn't? Would I be made to feel guilty??? I felt like saying "Well no actually, Lauren & I will be out all day but feel free to come in and make tea"

STrugglign at teh moment with my stupid hormonal mood swings, and Laurens .. testing of the boundaries, I am really finding it hard to deal with, does anyone have any suggestions of things I can read to help me help her through this? My initial response to everything seems to be frustration, anger, raised voice and its helping no one.

But to finish off the post with some sunshine & light ;)
"Don't photo me!"

I scrapped!

*beams*
Yay :)


Credit:
KateF 'Country Kitchen' & Faek Oak "Mossy Meadow Alpha" both gorgeous items can be found at pickleberrypop



Credit: Shabby Princess "Olivia Collection" gorgeous kit!